


incandescent (polaris)

by markhyuck



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Vampire, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2019-07-31
Packaged: 2020-07-27 15:21:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20048224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/markhyuck/pseuds/markhyuck
Summary: Jeno loves the stars, and Jaemin loves Jeno.He knows that Jeno loves the peace that comes with staring at the celestial heavens. That he loves the feeling of being stuck in limbo with his own star.Jaemin is Jeno's Polaris, twinkling like a reminder of of an unmade promise, tracing patterns across Jeno's sky with each passing night, but always there, the brightest star. Always will be.





	incandescent (polaris)

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by jaemin's song recommendation, [almost is never enough](https://open.spotify.com/track/442j8VxaB60dWf9cBFuX5w?si=4tqepCqRRWyrd2zoxou_YQ). i was also listening to lukas graham's [love somebody](https://open.spotify.com/track/2JqnpexlO9dmvjUMCaLCLJ?si=r1NId0ehQuS2_v34d2ul_A) as i wrote this.
> 
> **TW/ DEATH**, but you'll figure out why i didn't add it into the tags if you read to the end! ;)

Jeno has always loved the stars.

Always, especially on nights like this, when the clouds are stripped back to reveal the glittering night sky, and Jaemin lies beside him on the blanket covering the grass beneath them.

Even in the dark, Jaemin is incandescent.

Jeno smiles at him, and his boyfriend flashes one back, pearly whites glinting under the scattered light from lampposts that seem so far away.

Time moves slowly; the earth revolves around them. Just Jeno and Jaemin. Jaemin and Jeno.

Just like it will always be.

Jeno remembers when he'd spotted Jaemin for the first time in the hallway of their middle school, eyes wide and grin toothy.

It wasn't hard to like the boy with the chubby cheeks and branded schoolbags. Eyes clung to him wherever he went, and Jeno wasn't an exception.

Final year of middle school found the two boys sitting together in Biology, Jeno completely clueless as Jaemin, beside him, napped and answered problems with ease when called out for it.

Jeno asked questions, and Jaemin answered them. Sometimes they went to the library together, sometimes they got ice cream. Eventually, Jaemin brought his books over to study at Jeno's, with Bongshik curled up by his feet.

They celebrated Christmas together that year, and Jaemin held out Jeno's gift and watched as he unwrapped it. It was Jeno's first time receiving a game console.

Jaemin taught him how to use it, and let Jeno beat him at every game. Two days later, Jeno was beating him at every game.

Jaemin threatened to take it back.

Summer came, and with it, the end of middle school. When Jaemin kissed Jeno's cheek goodbye, Jeno grabbed Jaemin's arm and nervously asked for his number.

Jeno never called him.

High school came and went. Jeno passed Jaemin once in the supermarket, and they'd both smiled and waved cordially, but Jaemin was already at the checkout, and Jeno two aisles down. By the time Jeno was done getting the groceries his mom needed, it was almost half an hour later.

Still, Jeno found Jaemin leaning on the wall outside the supermarket fiddling with his phone, shopping bags at his feet.

Jaemin's hair was chestnut brown then, cheekbones high. His smile was still the same, if not a bit sharper, more pristine.

Jeno felt out of place beside him. As if Jaemin had grown up and left him behind.

He looked up as Jeno approached, and suddenly it was as if high school never happened. Jaemin was still Jaemin, and Jeno was still Jeno. A few years of not seeing each other hadn't changed anything; Jaemin's hugs were still warm and he was still the kindest person Jeno had ever met.

They parted with only goodbyes, no numbers this time, but Jeno still had Jaemin's contact saved as _Nana_ buried somewhere in his phone.

Some nights, Jeno had looked at it and wished it weren't too late to call Jaemin. That night, he tapped the 'call' option for the first time.

The call never went through.

The next time Jeno saw Jaemin, it was under the great rain tree whose branches stretched out over the path between the Science and Engineering faculty.

Jeno was simply a freshman having trouble coping with the new workload. Jaemin was holding the solution as he pored over medicine textbooks on the bench beneath the shade of the tree, looking significantly more like a driven university student than Jeno could ever hope to be.

"Is that Starbucks?" Jeno asked, and his breath caught his throat when Jaemin looked up, features arranging themselves into surprise and a new, _different_ coy smile. His lips curled slyly, kindly, prettily upwards as he nodded.

"I didn't know there was a Starbucks nearby."

Jeno didn't feel like Jeno any more, and Jaemin wasn't just Jaemin either. His pink hair was styled differently, and the top of his white dress shirt was unbuttoned. Jeno felt his throat go dry when his middle school friend promptly closed his books (Jeno noted with a bemused glance that one was titled 'Laughter is not the Best Medicine, Vol.7') and stood up with a grace that made Jeno's head spin.

"Then let me buy you a drink," Jaemin said smoothly, and turned down the path without waiting for a reply.

Jeno could only follow him mutely, drawn by the smile painted by the gods.

This time, Jeno gave Jaemin his number.

He didn't hear from the pink-haired boy until one week later. During that week, Jeno pushed away the repeated dreams that revolved around flirty text conversations with Jaemin to focus on his tutorials, and when finally the text arrived in the form of '_hey this is jaemin, it was nice to see you on campus, wanna get coffee and hang out soon? :)_', Jeno deleted the notification.

A couple of days later, Jeno finally gathered the courage to reply. Not a minute later, his phone lit up with a notification that read, '_meet me at bucks in 15mins ;)_'. Jeno ignored the feeling of deja vu rising in his chest, and quickly shoved his laptop into his bag.

Jaemin was especially handsome that day, a hint of makeup tinting his eyes that Jeno acknowledged with a compliment.

Jaemin kissed Jeno in Starbucks.

It was nothing special, just a quick lean over the tiny table and brief peck to the corner of Jeno's lips, but Jeno's heart fluttered as Jaemin's eyelashes did.

The second kiss lasted much longer and tasted like bitter coffee and caramel mixed together. Jeno barely had time to register anything before Jaemin was pulling him out of Starbucks and into the alley behind it, kissing Jeno like he was the air and Jaemin needed to breathe.

Jaemin kissed as easily as he smiled, and Jeno could barely keep up - could barely stand Jaemin's body flush against his, hands pressing against his chest as he pulled Jaemin closer, closer, _closer_. Every inch of skin that Jaemin touched burned with fire, and Jeno let himself be set ablaze, licked with tongues of fire that only fuelled him.

"Do you kiss people for fun?" Jaemin asked when he had a moment to breathe, and Jeno paused with his hands on the younger's waist.

"No," he decided.

He'd kissed Renjun the week before, and Donghyuck the week before Renjun, but he didn't want to just kiss any more.

Not with Jaemin in front of him. "No, I don't."

Jaemin had smiled breathlessly at Jeno then, incandescent.

It's the same way he smiles at Jeno now as they lie a tangle of limbs on the tiny blanket, his face alight with the fire of the stars.

Jeno turns his head to gaze at the night sky again, pulling his boyfriend closer by the waist. The now blond-haired boy snuggles closer to him, the blue strands streaking his bangs tickling Jeno's collarbones.

Jeno loves the stars, and Jaemin loves Jeno.

He knows that Jeno loves the peace that comes with staring at the celestial heavens. That he loves the feeling of being stuck in limbo with his own star.

Jaemin is Jeno's Polaris, twinkling like a reminder of of an unmade promise, tracing patterns across Jeno's sky with each passing night, but always there, the brightest star. Always will be.

Jaemin rambles about his day and Jeno doesn't mind, just lets himself be lulled to sleep by the soothing lilt of the younger's murmurs.

There comes a breaking point in every university student's life, where exams come in droves and assignments upon assignments pile up like cargo on a freight train.

For Jeno, it happens in his third year, when the aeronautical professors revamp the faculty's syllabus with barely a month's notice. By the time the exams roll around, his caffeine intake is nearly as high as Jaemin's (not quite), and he runs on pure stress.

"You look like you need some rest. We should probably head back, yeah?" Jaemin asks, as the ending credits of _Spiderman _begin to roll. His smile is sweet and so, so kind. Jeno wants to reach out and kiss him till he can see the stars in his eyes again, so he does.

When he pulls back, Jaemin is panting and the cinema is almost empty. "Yeah. I know we were supposed to have soju together after the movie. Sorry about that."

"Don't be ridiculous."

Jaemin's hand is cool in Jeno's as they walk out of the cinema complex, but he's still excitedly swinging their arms as he comments on the movie, giving Jeno a breakdown of it and a blow-by-blow rating. It's nice, listening to Jaemin talk always is, but Jeno's mind reels with formulas and aircraft parts from studying.

Jeno always takes him home, gives Jaemin's mum a kiss on the cheek when she greets them at the door. But he has a quiz tomorrow, so he hums distractedly and says, "I don't think I can walk you home today, I should be getting back."

Jeno spots Jaemin's bus turning onto the street, and misses the way Jaemin's smile wavers for a second.

"Sure, yeah, it's late and you're graded tomorrow." Jaemin's voice is cheery. His smile is still impossibly bright. Jeno leans in and kisses him again, a light one that calms himself.

"I'll see you after my quiz tomorrow, baby. Get home safe, yeah?"

Jaemin pouts, but shoots him a fond look nonetheless as he climbs onto the bus. "See you tomorrow, babe!"

"Text me when you get home!"

When Jeno wakes up, barely in time to throw his clothes on and rush to his 10am quiz, there's no '_good morning baby!!_' text from Jaemin, and no reply to Jeno's text either, even by the time his two hour-long open book quiz ends. He brushes it off and shoots Jaemin a, '_meet me at bucks in 15mins ;)_'.

Fifteen minutes comes and goes, and then half an hour. After forty-five minutes, Jeno remembers that he'd fallen asleep way before the time Jaemin would have arrived home, since he lives in the campus dormitories while Jaemin lives halfway across Seoul.

Jeno shoots up in his chair.

Jaemin hadn't texted about getting home safely.

With panic rising in his chest, he fumbles with his phone to punch in Jaemin's number and lift it to his ear, listening with bated breath.

The call doesn't go through.

Neither does his second, third, fifth and tenth call. By then, Jeno is hopping onto a cab, shaking with anxiety as he dials Jaemin's home line which Mrs Na will pick up, the way he always does when he wants to come over and surprise Jaemin. To his relief, the line rings.

And rings.

And rings.

Mrs Na doesn't pick up. Jeno swears under his breath. The ride takes half an hour (it would take forty minutes, but Jeno irritably snaps at the driver to go faster - something Jaemin would reproach him for - and the driver must sense his desperation because he compliantly steps on the accelerator).

Jeno stumbles up to Jaemin's apartment door and he notices the lights are off, but he unlocks the door with the spare key he has anyway, and flings the door open to an empty house.

He searches all the rooms just in case - finds Mrs Na, Mr Na and Jaemin's number all taped to the fridge door, written in Jaemin's handwriting. Dialling Mrs Na's personal line proves fruitless, as expected, but Mr Na picks up on the ninth ring.

"Hello?"

"Hello? It's me, Jeno. I'm sorry to be rudely calling like this, but do you know where Jaemin-"

The line beeps, and Jeno belatedly realises he's been cut off. But then his phone pings. It's a location tag from Mr Na, and when Jeno pulls up the Naver map with shaking hands, his heart sinks.

The title of the location tag reads _Gangnam Hospital, Emergency Wing_.

Everything in the hospital is bright, but not like Jaemin. Blinding in the worst possible way, and Jeno runs through the expansive A&E lobby to get to reception. To his surprise, he comes face to face with Mark, who is one year Jaemin's senior, a graduated medical student.

Jeno doesn't question why they placed a medical graduate at the welcome counter. He doesn't feel very welcome.

The whole hospital wing, from the doctors down to reception, is engineered to handle destruction, and Jeno is already self-destructing.

"You here for Jaemin?" Mark asks quickly.

Jeno doesn't need to answer, because Mark is already pointing him down the hallway while explaining that Jaemin had been involved in an assault on his way home. He was found by a passer-by past midnight, unconscious and bleeding out from a gash on his leg.

Jeno wants to run to Jaemin, to hold his hand and let him know that everything is okay, but something in Mark's gaze holds him back. Mark's eyes are always solemn, but this time, Jeno sees his own panic reflected in them, along with an emotion he doesn't want to put a name to.

So he waits. Waits as Mark clears his throat, and waits some more as Mark looks away.

"He won't make it," Jeno whispers, blood rushing in his ears. It's not a question, it's a statement. His own voice sounds so far away.

Mark faces him again, and Jeno finally registers the other emotion reflected in his soulless irises. Grief.

Jeno tears his gaze from Mark and sprints down the hallway.

When Jeno was in elementary school, he had received his first phone as a gift from his parents. He was ecstatic, and had promptly immersed himself into the world of 2D games like _Snakes_ and _Bounce_ for hours on end. To ten-year-old Jeno, that had been entertainment enough, and his phone quickly became something he cherished.

He never went anywhere without it, and always held it securely or kept it tucked safely in his pocket.

That was until his parents confiscated it because he wouldn't touch his homework in favour of playing _Snakes_. Jeno felt like he'd lost the world then. Ironically, his parents had been the one to give his phone to him and then take it away.

Jeno feels like his ten-year-old self now, as he grips onto Jaemin's hand.

Jaemin, his boyfriend of three years, whose eyes are closed, face a sheet of snow. Jaemin, whose usually-cool hands are now as cold and clammy. His heart still beats, sustained by the single packet of blood they managed to scramble up, but the doctor had shook her head after the transfusion. No more, Jeno had read off her lips. He still feels so far away from it all. We're out of AB blood packets, they are hard to come by. Jeno heard himself swearing at the doctor, but Mrs Na held him back, crying into his shoulder.

Fate had a hell of a hand in bringing them together, but ironically, it was also the one to tear them apart.

It's barely crossing into the evening, but Jeno can't see anything. Everything is murky and distant. Can't hear anything, except his heart splintering a bit more with every laboured breath Jaemin takes. The bandage on his thigh is still soaked with blood.

The wound was too deep to stop the bleeding, the nurse said, but even to Jeno who doesn't give a shit about Biology, it sounds like horse piss. Didn't stitches exist for a reason?

When night falls and the stars come out, muted but still so, so bright the way Jaemin no longer is, Jeno hates them. Hates the way they mock him, hates the way the round moon stands sentry over Jaemin's lifeless body as the beeps of his heart monitor slow, and then cease to a shrill tone.

The doctor rushes in, and Mr Na begs her to save Jaemin. Jeno can't hear what Jaemin's father says, the guilt is so loud, but he can feel rather than hear the tremor in his voice.

What he does hear, however, is the doctor's sympathetic "sorry" before she pronounces Jaemin dead.

🌕

Jaemin's funeral is a noisy affair. His own family is small, with only a couple of families of relatives, and Jeno and his family are there too, helping the Na family make arrangements. But Mr and Mrs Na's friends stream in and out, and Jaemin's friends - they are so _many_.

Sure, Jeno's always known Jaemin was a popular student, he always was even back in middle school, and in unversity it was sometimes hard for Jeno to take him on dates because, "I can't, I'm having dinner with Yukhei and his Chinese friends, Nono!" or "Sorry baby, I promised I'd make it for Mark's slumber party with him and Donghyuck and a couple of other medicine and music majors, I'll go to the theme park with you next weekend instead?"

Still, when nearly half the medicine faculty and a ton of other kids Jeno doesn't know turn up, he's blown away because everyone is so nice and sincere, and most of them hug Jeno after observing their minute of silence.

It's amazing to think that Jaemin has impacted all of them one way or another. Some of them show Jeno pictures of gifts Jaemin got them, anything from a Launchpad to a Gucci belt.

When Renjun shows Jeno a picture of him and Jaemin out shopping for Jeno's birthday present together, taken just a week before Jaemin passed, Jeno finally breaks down.

"I didn't walk him home," Jeno whispers. His vision is blurry, and his cheeks feel wet. He doesn't feel so far away now. Everything is so real, so near, so immediate. Renjun's arms are around him and Jeno is sobbing, everything is cold and stifling and people pat his back, murmur reassuringly.

Jeno doesn't care. They're not Jaemin.

"It's not your fault, Jeno," Renjun mutters, right by Jeno's ear. He blanches, pulls back as if stung. Renjun fixes him with a steely gaze, but it's not fiery like the look he usually wears. Renjun looks so soft around the edges now. Somehow, that makes Jeno feel worse.

"Once they've caught the murderer, he'll be safe, Jeno."

Jeno doesn't agree. It's pointless to try keeping Jaemin safe now. Not when he should have tried harder earlier.

Not when he watches as the casket disappears from view the next day, taking a piece of his heart with it - with Jaemin.

One by one, the stars in his life go out, beginning with his Polaris. 

🌕

"Lee Jeno, Aeronautical Engineering, Bachelor of Engineering with second-class honours."

Somewhere in the back of the crowd, Jeno hears Yukhei, Renjun and a bunch of other voices he can't distinguish cheering. His heart warms, but he doesn't glance back as he mounts the stage in his too-tight graduation gown to shake hands with a tall man he doesn't know and to flash a smile at the cameras. They give him his certificate, and then they're calling the next graduate.

Convocation brings with it a full day of family action, and Jeno finds himself crowded by first his friends, whom he takes only about three hundred pictures with, and then his own parents, and Jaemin's. Mrs Na is beautiful when Jeno finally lets go of his mother to accept her flowers. Calla lilies, the same ones that Jaemin loved the most.

Her eyes brim with unshed tears, and Jeno knows that his graduation is only half the reason. If Jaemin were still here, he would be beside Jeno in a matching gown, too.

The air is solemn, but only until Mrs Na pulls Jeno in for a hearty hug. For a moment, Jeno feels like he's hugging Jaemin again. "We're proud of you, Jeno."

"Thanks." He flashes his brightest grin at both sets of parents. That's what being with Jaemin had taught him. To smile, and to smile freely.

He'll carry Jaemin with him wherever he goes now, in the smile he'll never forget to wear on his lover's behalf.

In the weeks following Jaemin's passing, the night sky had become abhorrent. Everything reminded to Jeno of his boyfriend, from the smiles of strangers, to his own blonde hairdo, to the waning moon. Jeno retreated into his room for weeks on end, surviving on water and guilt.

Coffee disappeared from his diet. He nearly picked up smoking one Tuesday evening, but Jaemin always hated the scent of cigarettes and so Jeno dumped the pack that he'd bought into the nearest trashcan.

And thus he went back to staring at the night sky, trying to block out the demons that whispered into his heart that it was his fault, for not paying attention. For not being good enough. For causing the death of the one purely amazing person he had in his life.

The moon smiled at Jeno kindly sometimes, and loomed over him other times.

Now, one year over, Jeno has reconciled with the sky, and Polaris shines again, though not quite as beautiful as before. The North Scar, Jeno calls it. He has a small tattoo of the star on his wrist now (he calls it Polawrist), to remind himself of what Jaemin was to him. Still is, until now.

The wind is biting cold today, and Jeno shivers as he lays on the blanket over the grass patch that he used to share with Jaemin. He shifts to pull Jaemin's half of the blanket over to wrap around his body, but a hand stops him. A rustling of grass, and someone lies down beside him.

Jeno freezes.

For one crazy moment, Jeno thinks he catches a whiff of Jaemin's cologne and his mind screams, before his rationality catches up to him. Then he turns his head, and his rationality dives off the edge of his heart.

Because it's Jaemin, lying on the blanket next to him, looking so small and vulnerable that it makes Jeno want to cry. Of all the dreams he's had, this is one of the best. Jaemin's visited his dreams so many times, but never in one where Jeno is stargazing.

Jeno's heart trembles. Jaemin is still so, so brilliant.

"I love you," Jeno chokes out, and Jaemin turns to him in surprise.

"I don't want to wake up yet, so please, don't go anywhere. Just stay here."

Jaemin looks lost for a moment, for Jeno just slides his hand into Jaemin's and intertwines their fingers, leaning in to kiss the younger for a sweet, sweet moment.

Jaemin's skin and lips are ice. Much icier than when he was lying on the hospital bed, and Jeno looks up in confusion to find Jaemin staring at him with an emotion he's never seen before on the features he is so familiar with. Guilt.

They're a reflection of Jeno's own gaze.

"You're not asleep, Jeno, it's really me," Jaemin says, his voice deeper than Jeno remembered it to be. Jeno can't breathe. Jaemin sits up and takes both his hands. His fingers and palms are as cold as ice, and it's so unnerving, but Jeno loves looking at him.

"I'm... I'm here. I'm sorry I took so long to come to you."

"What do you mean?" Reality catches up to Jeno, and he didn't ever think he'd need to do what they always say in the books, but he does it now - pinches himself, and yelps in pain.

"You're not dreaming," Jaemin's eyes are filled with tears now. "Did you really think you were? I'm sorry I took so long."

Jeno can't process anything he is saying, so he just clutches onto the younger's fingers. "Why are you so cold?"

Jaemin opens his mouth to answer, then shuts it again. Jeno watches as shadows pass over his face, a conflicting mix of longing and sorrow, and then he is suddenly surging forward, gathering Jeno into his arms and pulling him in for a cold, cold hug. 

Somehow, Jeno has his head pressed Jaemin's chest, and for a beat, he doesn't get anything that is going on, until his brain registers the deafening silence. He pulls back, uncomprehending. "You died in the hospital."

"I was bitten," Jaemin whispers. "By a vampire, days before the full moon."

"They buried you."

"The vampires dug me out after the full moon ended."

"Vampires are a myth, Jaemin! What are you saying?"

"I'm saying," Jaemin cries, and he all but flings himself at Jeno, taking his hand to press up against Jaemin's chest where his heart should be, except it's void of the gentle thudding that Jeno has grown so accustomed to when he spent nights with the younger bundled up in the sheets. "I'm alive, Jeno. Just like the myths say."

Jeno searches the younger's face. Every detail he remembers about his boyfriend - the slope of his nose, the high cheekbones, his long eyelashes - is mapped out before him, on the face of a stranger who calls himself a vampire. He swallows thickly.

"If you're my Jaemin," he manages to croak out. "Tell me something about us that I don't know."

Jaemin's expression of hopelessness disappears. For a breathtaking moment, he smiles again. Blinding. Bedazzling. Incandescent.

Jeno doesn't care if the vampire's hands are ice. His smile is still as bright as ever and so undeniably Jaemin, his unbeating heart as kind as the day Jeno lost him.

"When you were in middle school," Jaemin breathes. "I liked you so much, but you weren't out yet and you didn't know you liked boys, but I saw you talk about that senior Doyoung like he hung the stars. You were always the sweetest, and you smiled at everyone in the hallways even if they didn't like you. Before our final year started, I asked to be seated with you when I found out we were in the same Biology class. You made confused noises all the time in Biology, and I thought it was just a middle school thing but when we studied together in Starbucks you still made confused noises all the time and I was still so in love with you after all those years.

"I waited through all of high school for you to text me, and when I met you again I wanted so badly to ask for your number, but I thought you were straight back then, so I took a step back.

"Then in university, Donghyuck mentioned your name in passing to Mark when they were having a fight, and I realised you weren't straight after all, and that was when you finally saw me even though I was trying to get your attention for days. I even sat under that tree on purpose because I knew you'd pass by."

Jeno stares as Jaemin rolls his eyes, lower lip jutting out into a pout. "I love you, Jeno. I always have."

"Jaemin," he says slowly, and watches as Jaemin's eyes flicker with hope, not daring to look away.

"I'm sorry I didn't walk you home that day. This wouldn't have happened if... if I had just-"

Jaemin's excited smile falters, and Jeno notices it this time, catching his hand and pressing a gentle kiss to each knuckle. "Forgive me?"

"There was never anything to forgive, Jen."

"I'm sorry regardless."

A beat of silence stretches out before Jaemin smiles, and it's sad, but not quite. It reminds Jeno of a certain star in the sky. Jeno glances up at Polaris, and extends his own wrist to Jaemin.

"The brightest star," Jaemin murmurs. "Jeno, I can't blush, but please pretend that I am. I can't believe you got a tattoo."

Jeno chuckles, leaning close to lean his forehead against Jaemin's. Their lips brush briefly, an unspoken promise sealing itself between them.

"You can't blush... Jaemin... if you're a vampire... do you have like, big baby teefs?"

"What the fuck, Lee Jeno?"

🌕

There are days when Jeno wakes up, feeling cold despite the duvet he has covering him. Jaemin's hair tickles his cheek, and Jeno takes a while to revel in the moment, with his boyfriend (who is the reason for his thermal discomfort) pressed flush against him, face smoothed into a peaceful expression.

At times like this, Jeno wishes Jaemin were still human, because the minute Jeno brushes a finger over Jaemin's cheek he rouses, and it's as if he never knew sleep. His smile is a notch too bright for barely having woken up, but vampires don't know sleepiness - don't _need _sleep, Jaemin just does when he gets tired of staring at Jeno's face all night.

"Did you sleep well?" Jaemin asks, and Jeno nods, as always. It's much easier to fall into slumber now, when his heart can rest easy.

"Did you?" He responds in turn, purely out of habit, and Jaemin just laughs, breath still smelling like coffee, another thing Na Jaemin doesn't need but drinks anyway for the comfort of habit, even if it hurts him.

On these days, when Jaemin is smiling so incandescently, Jeno pinches himself. _He's with me, not someone else_. And he's still scared, still so scared that it's all a dream.

But when Jaemin's lips brush against his and the edge of a fang scrapes his skin, a reminder of the silent vow they shared on the field beneath the night sky, Jeno is reminded of how much he has always loved the stars.

Time moves slowly; the earth revolves around them. Just Jeno and Jaemin. Jaemin and Jeno.

Just like it will always be.


End file.
